Oh, This is FUNNY

This is what the Weather Channel has listed for the Fourth of July, here in Beaverton...
Watches and Warnings Beaverton Forecast
HEAT ADVISORY NOW IN EFFECT UNTIL 8 PM PDT SATURDAY...

WARM WEATHER WILL CONTINUE THROUGH INDEPENDENCE DAY WITH VALLEY
TEMPERATURES REACHING THE MID 90S. TEMPERATURES IN THE COAST
RANGE AND CASCADE FOOTHILLS WILL ALSO BE QUITE WARM WITH READINGS
IN THE MID 80S TO LOWER 90S.

AT RISK POPULATIONS CAN BE ESPECIALLY VULNERABLE TO HEAT RELATED
ILLNESSES DURING EPISODES OF HOT WEATHER. DRINK PLENTY OF FLUIDS
AND TRY TO STAY OF THE SUN DURING THE HOTTEST PART OF THE DAY.

PRECAUTIONARY/PREPAREDNESS ACTIONS...

A HEAT ADVISORY MEANS THAT A PERIOD OF HOT TEMPERATURES IS
EXPECTED. THE COMBINATION OF HOT TEMPERATURES AND HIGH HUMIDITY
WILL COMBINE TO CREATE A SITUATION IN WHICH HEAT ILLNESSES ARE
POSSIBLE. DRINK PLENTY OF FLUIDS...STAY IN AN AIR-CONDITIONED
ROOM...STAY OUT OF THE SUN...AND CHECK UP ON RELATIVES AND
NEIGHBORS.